it's a miracle! 10/29/2009

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Michael went running with me Sunday afternoon.  That's incredible.  And it made my day.  Well, that and an absolutely incredible time of worship that morning.

I cannot tell you how much I love the Sabbath!

 

I'm just gonna go for it 10/23/2009

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Life is a little crazy at the moment which unfortunately makes it hard--make that, impossible-- to record all the stories of people and places that fill up these days.  I've been wanted to write this post for a while, though, and I apologize that I'm just now getting around to it. 

A few weeks ago I spent several days over at the Farm with my family and some dear friends.  Here are some of my favorite pictures from the time...  (more pictures here)

and the random sofa inside of it...  huh?!

I had been wanting to explore this barn for quite a while, so it was fun to finally climb around in it.  The land around here is just littered with abandoned old barns... that and beautiful, rusty, worthless pick-up trucks.

My Fall dream came true when we spent hours one night around a campfire under the stars, braving the freezing coldness with three layers of coats and a cup of hot chocolate.  The stars may have been partially hidden by the clouds and some of the coldness may have snuck through my layers, but I still believe that campfires are one of the greatest of God's good gifts.   

As always, we did a fair amount of caving over the weekend.  Some of us spend hours searching the mountain for new caves-- and actually found quite a few.  The picture above (which no one in my family seems to admire nearly as much as I do) is taken inside a cave without the flash.  Those are headlamp trails.  Suh-weet!

There are many more memories and many more pictures.  Many great conversations and moments of worship.  How could we not worship?

I want to chase
the daylight
like it's the last day
of my life
I want to run
and hide myself in the sun
and feel all these fears melt away
and I will never look back
no I will never look back
I'm gonna live this life
chasing the daylight

-chasing the daylight (phillip larue) 

 

it's Fall! 10/05/2009

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I saw my breath the other morning as I was running in the cold, and realized, for the first time, that it is Fall.  I've been celebrating ever since!

Welcome, Fall.  Welcome, colorful trees, crunchy leaves, and flannel pajama pants.  Welcome, acorns and pumpkins and scarecrows... hayrides and bonfires and harvest moons... cold nights and hot chocolates... freezing soccer games and early morning runs... square dancing and yard raking.  I'm excited about it all!

......................................

I know it's been a while since I last posted.  In the interested of time (both yours and mine) I'm going to make this short and bullet-pointed.  Well I'm going to try anyway.  So... here are a few of my favorite things about life these days:

ESL- God is doing neat things.  I realized a little while ago that this will be my last year teaching ESL here and have been praying for  ways to "redeem the time".   I want to introduce these hungry students to so much more than the English language.  Last week my assistant teacher (a dear 20-something named Ashley who interns with middle schoolers at church) got the swine flu.  She had our planned lessons with her, so on my way to ESL I found out that I had ten minutes to figure out how to fill up two hours.  Long story short I found a simplified Bible at the church and made a bunch of copies of the creation story.  Most of my students had never heard of the Bible and we ended up reading and discussing it for a good hour.  I asked them if they would be interested in going over some other Bible stories the next week, and their faces lit up.  So they're excited and I'm excited and we're talking about the Bible and the God who wrote the Bible for a least an hour each week now!  Isn't He awesome?!

Panera- I got a job!  Or actually, two.  I was volunteering at church, helping to cook and serve and clean up the 300+ person dinners that Cedar Springs offers on Wednesday nights, and they graciously decided to employ me.  That's only one day a week though, so my Father, always faithful, got me a job at Panera.  And when I say "God got me the job", I mean it!  The story is incredible but too long to write out, so if you're interested, call me or shoot me an email and I'll gladly tell you all that God did! 

Tuesdays- ...have become one of my favorite days of the week.  I get up around 5 am to spend some time with the Father before meeting Sondra for an early morning run.  At 5, an early morning run sounds just awful, but once I get outside into the cool air and the sunrise, I remember how much I love running.  Tuesday also means lots of volleyball.  A couple of us started playing indoors at the church with a group of adults and college students.  It's funny none of them actually go to our church- they just play v-ball there from 6-9 every Tuesday night.  And they're good, too.  It's been a blast playing with and getting to know these guys!

Church- Lately I've been at the church a lot.  Sundays for worship, Tuesdays for volleyball, Wednesdays for 'work', Thursdays for ESL, Fridays and Saturdays for siblings' soccer games, and usually a meeting or two sometime else during the week.  Some of the janitors joke that I'm there as much as they are.  The neat thing is I'm there enough to become friends with the janitors!  And tons of other staff / members... it's been such a joy to get more involved with my church and the body of Christ here in Knoxville. 

The Bible- Well, specifically, the ESV Study Bible.  It's 2,750 pages long and the size of a small building, but once you get over the initial intimidation, it's really a treasure.  It was my Grandma who actually inspired me to read it.  I walked in on my her a few weeks ago and saw her with a book in her lap.  I asked her what she was doing and she said "oh, just learning".  I realized that after all these years, she is still learning from the book of Luke... she is still making reading the Scriptures a priority.  Her three-word comment called me up short.  I realized just how much I have to learn.   So for almost a month now I have been soaking up the Bible for a couple hours every day. It has been such a rich time.  This is God's word to us!  I want to learn what He has to say... I want to learn about Him.  Right now I'm in the middle of Numbers headed towards Revelation.  Hold me accountable- shoot me an email sometime and ask me where I am and what I've been learning!  The Lord deserves so much more of my time... all of my time, come to think of it.

People!  There have been so many incredible people in my life lately.  I wish I could give you a picture and a paragraph for each one.  I wish I could tell you all about...

Danny and Blake, the volleyball players
Austin the homeless helper, Jesus lover, and fellow Spanish student
Charlie, Randy, Matt, and Arthur- the janitors
Parke, the barefoot guitar player
Christian, the soon to be airforce pararescuer
Kenny, the crazy GM
and so so many more!

Some are Christians, some are not, but all of them make life fascinating!  God is so good to me!

Well there's a long overdue update.  I'd love to hear how you guys are doing and what you are looking forward to most this Fall.  For me it would have to be singing worship songs around a campfire under the stars... one of my very favorite things in life!

It's a beautiful time to be alive, guys, enjoy it!

 

bragging on the bro... 09/20/2009

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Just thought I'd take a second to brag on my brother.  Not only is he ridiculously handsome and one of the funniest guys I know, but he's also a pretty hard worker when he sets his mind to it.

He spent all day Saturday with dad and a couple other guys knocking out his Eagle Scout project (finally).  They built a deck for a guy who lives in a castle on the top of a mountain and holds work camps and marriage retreats up there.  A really neat guy with an awesome ministry.  I wasn't there but here are a few pics...

got started early...

in the beginning

finished: still not clear on why you would build a deck in the middle of the woods, but it's a little late for that...

After working hard all day, he still had plenty of energy for us to go square dancing last night.  And to get up early this morning for church.  I was impressed.

It's really been a blast getting to know Michael these past few years.  He puts up with a lot from me... whether it's killing bugs or playing frisbee in the rain, I can be pretty demanding :).  But to be honest, I'm totally excited to see what the Lord does in and through this guy in the years to come.  I'm confident He's got amazing plans up His divine sleeve, and I'm looking forward to many more years of hanging out with Michael.

Personally I'm convinced he should be a missionary pilot, but there's some selfish motives behind that one...

Air Force some day?

 

new favorite poem! not sure what the old favorite was... 09/18/2009

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Batter my heart, three-person'd God; for you
as yet but knock; breathe, shine, and seek to mend;
that I may rise, and stand, o'erthrow me, and bend
your force, to break, blow, burn, and make me new.

I, like usurp'd town, to another due,
labour to admit you, but O, to no end.
Reason, your viceroy in me, me should defend,
but is captived, and proves week or untrue.

Yet dearly I love you, and would be loved fain,
but am betroth'd unto your enemy;
divorce me, untie, or break that knot again,
take me to you, imprison me, for I,
except you enthrall me, shall never be free,
nor ever chaste, except you ravish me.

-John Donne

 

knee slapping and slacklining 09/14/2009

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It really doesn't take a whole lot to make me laugh, but every once in a while something strikes me as being so funny that I think I really ought to share the joy with someone...

I heard this song on the way to play some v-ball with Michael, Sarah Beth, and Andrew one day, and I literally laughed the entire ride.

Enjoy "Guitarzan".  Brilliant.

Here are the lyrics in case you want to sing along... good luck lip syncing better than these guys though!

                                  ............................

Okay here's the second thing that made me laugh for more than eight minutes straight...

I have been on Craigslist a lot lately looking for a job and a car and almost everything else (both of which you could pray about, by the way, if it comes to mind!) and someone in my family stumbled across this ad the other day.  No joke, this is exactly what it said: 

1 Stinky Old Dog

I have this hound mix dog that I absolutely HATE!  We had an issue when he was a 1 year old puppy, he bit me and I have never forgiven him.  He is now 12 years old and just as smelly as ever.

My husband said I could put this add on here if I was bluntly honest and asked $800 as a rehoming fee (he still wants this nasty dog).

About the dog:

His name is Smedly aka Smelly, he likes to be called Flash.  He has allergies, and is allergic to just about everything.  I have the lab test from the vet to go with him so you can try to figure out what he can have, and where would be a suitable place for him to stay.  We at one point had him on steroids to help with the allergies but that just made him fat (138 pounds) and mean.  He is now about 90ish pounds, has half his hair, stinks like crazy, and itches all the time.

This would be a great dog for a nasty old man, or someone who just wants a gnat collector (when hes around the gnats leave you alone and swarm around him),  He is also good at laying under the porch (which is funny when people come over and try to figure out just where that smell might be coming from while trying not to offend you).  He would also be great for a guy who is trying to break up with someone because with this dog around no woman would be able to stand the smell for long and you would inevitably be left to hang out with your new friend Flash all by yourself, nothin quite like a bachelor pad!

He likes to poop on the driveway usually where you like to walk, I think he does it on purpose just to see if he can "get" me.  He is old so in the winter time it takes him a while to get started, but if you can stand the stink he is a great foot warmer.

My husband says this about covers it, so if you could find it in your heart to save me from another winter with this stinky old dog I would be eternally grateful.  If not i understand, I dont want him either.

Hope to hear from ANYONE soon.   And thank you for taking the time to read this.

(oh by the way he is fixed.  I would not want him to breed with anything!)

I read this out loud to anyone who would listen - and a couple people who wouldn't - and when I checked on it again in thirty minutes the ad was gone.  So sorry if you were set on buying it. 

                           ......................................

Have you heard of slacklining?  This video is great.  It came dangerously close to making me cry, but then a lot of things do...

And this guy is just a straight up idiot.  But a talented one...

                                ...............................

I was reading this morning about how the Lord made us in His image.  Astounding! Humans are so incredibly skilled- whether they are good at songwriting, lip moving, advertising, or slacklining -they are talented and creative.  So recognize and enjoy the incredible people around you and think about the One who "skillfully wrought them in the depths of the earth" (Ps 135:15).  Whatever talent and creativity we may have is just a dim reflection of His.  If that.

What a God!

 

let the nations be glad! 09/11/2009

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Last Sunday I was sitting in a rather small room with a rather large crowd listening to a dear friend explain the Gospel.  To my right was a Palestinean translating for an Ethiopian, to my left was a Chinese translating for a Japanese, and right next to them was a Taiwanese translating for another Chinese.

Welcome to the International Class! 



This is a Sunday School class like no other, and it's been a joy to be a part of it. It started a few months ago with a handful of excited Americans and a lot of prayer.  I remember the first day of class- we weren't sure who would show up and we were thrilled to welcome the six or seven who did.  The class has multiplied since then.  Students began bringing their friends and co-workers, and now we have to find a bigger room.  It's a wonderful problem to have!  

Some of the Internationals are strong believers (a few have even been persecuted in other countries for their faith), some are honest seekers, and some deny the living God.  But every Sunday morning we get together to sing, share stories, and talk about Jesus of Nazareth and what it means to follow Him.  I love hearing the Scripture read in different languages and the life stories of these people who have come to Knoxville from different ends of the earth.  I love hearing how God led them to this class- all the way from China or Ghana! 

So I'm learning a lot.  And finding out how much I really don't know.  And making some good friends.  And being more and more amazed by this Jesus that I love.


(The picture above is of Yeon Soo, a woman from South Korea who is in both the International Class and my ESL class.)

..............................

ESL started up again last week.  Here are some pics from last night's class.  So much fun!

A while ago I promised to introduce you to some of the people the Lord is putting in my life this year.  Today I want you to meet José...

The first thing I noticed about José was his smile.  It seemed to be permanently attached to his face.  He was the first student to show up at my class last week, so I got to spend a few minutes talking with him.  His story was fascinating...

When he was only 14, José snuck across the border by himself.  He had five pesos and nothing else- no where to stay, no one to contact, no work, no food, no money, and no language.   He told me how he still remembers being hungry and how one American bought him a big burrito.  He also remembers being thirsty and how another American filled a coke bottle with gasoline and gave it to him with a smile.  Not knowing any better, José chugged it, gagged, and then listened as the American screamed at him and chased him away. That was ten years ago.  José hasn't been back to Mexico since.  He has a big family: ten siblings ("Well, twelve actually," he says, "but two have died.")  He hasn't seen his family since he crossed the border ten years ago, but he remembers how his mother cried the day he left.

So what makes José smile all the time?  I'm not sure yet... I'll have to find out.


There are so many other interesting people in my class.  Like José, each one has a story.  They have come from all over the world and somehow they ended up in class B210 in Knoxville, TN.  I don't believe it's an accident, and I want to do so much more than teach them to read and write and pronounce this crazy language.

Pray that they will see Jesus.

Pray that the nations will be glad in Him!

 

Britney Spears and Michael Jackson 09/02/2009

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I should be in bed.  It's been a long day and I have an early morning coming up, but I wanted to get this out of my system while I'm still passionate about it.  I heard this song by Bebo Norman a few months ago, and it was like a slap in the face.  And then some how I got started on this subject at the dinner table tonight and kept going on about it for a good ten minutes.  I'm not sure if the video is clear enough to understand the lyrics (if you are interested in them, here's a link), but the idea behind the song is pretty simple...

I think most Christians treat celebrities wrong.  At best we try to ignore them; at worst we lash out against them.  We get a guilty feeling every time we see a picture of a celebrity on a magazine in the check-out aisle, and we don't talk about people like Michael Jackson and Britney Spears when there are little kids in the room.  We have this unstated philosophy that Christians shouldn't be interested in people like that.  And yet Christians, of all people, should be interested in the Britney Spears and Michael Jacksons of the world.  We should care deeply for them.  They are souls.  And they are dearly loved by our Master.

I remember the day Michael Jackson died.  I was in Memphis when the news broke, and I remember being surprised at how many people were walking around in stunned silence or actually crying.  It was all over the campus.  It was all over the country.  It was all over the news- America worshiped Michael Jackson.  At the time, I could think of no one that made me more disgusted.

The students and staff threw an improptu dance that night to honor Michael Jackson.  It was complete with lights, video, and his classic songs.  I couldn't even bring myself to go watch it.  I literally felt sick.  This man had spent his entire life pursuing everything that the world had to offer, and it had killed him.  He got his riches and he got his fame- he was was worshiped by millions.  And in the end he died of a drug overdose- alone.  But it's not his life really that makes me sick... it's the eternity that he is facing now.  It's the fact that the end of his life was really just the beginning.  And when I think about it that way, I cannot hate Michael Jackson; I can only feel gut-wrenchingly sorry for him.  As I write this, I still feel sick. 

Don't condemn the celebrity who has been married five times and is now living with someone else (this story is in the Bible, by the way).  Pity her.  Pray for her.  Love her. She does not know what true love is.  She does not know the Way, the Truth, and the Life.  Except for the grace of God, you and I would just as lost and confused as she is.

We go to great lengths to tell the "poor heathens" around the world about the love of Christ- why do we ignore the needy within our own borders?  God is big enough to turn Britney's life completely around- why don't we pray for that?  She and so many others are desperate.  The field is white. 

Britney, I'm sorry.  I'm sorry that the Church has not loved you and others as we ought.  I'm sorry that we have not represented our Lord well.  Michael, I'm sorry.  I serve a big God, and I pray that -in the last moments of your life- He touched your heart and made you new.
Jesus, I want Your eyes!  I want to see those around me the way You see them.  I want Your heart.  Oh teach me to love!

 

thoughts on relationships and running... 08/26/2009

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People. That's what really matters- people.  Whether they live in a little village on the other side of the world, or whether they share a room with me, my interactions with them are of eternal importance.  I can either be a used as a tool that draws them closer to the Lord, or a stumbling block that keeps them away.  Everything I do matters because it should be a reflection of the Gospel.  Because people are watching.  And because, in the end, it's all about relationships.  And I must die every day because of that.  Gladly.  (May 18, 2008) 

                            ....................................

I wrote that in my journal more than a year ago, and I'm still thinking about it.  This year is going to be a strange one.  With very little to do acedemically, I feel like the Father is telling me over and over that this year is all about relationships... my relationship with Him, and my relationship with those He has put around me.

It's an exciting time!  But if I am not walking in the will of my Master it could easily become a wasted year.  Something tells me He won't let that happen, though.  He is so faithful and if you dedicate your time to getting to know others for His glory, He will bring those people into your life.  In the coming months I hope to record just a bit of His faithfulness by sharing a few stories of those He is introducing me to.  I'll start with Sandra.

I met Sandra on a bus going up to the Smokies.  I was spending the day (last Saturday) in the mountains with a group of internationals. 
I had never seen Sandra before but she was really friendly and I quickly learned that she was Egyptian and she was a senior in college.  A few minutes later I found out she lived barely two miles from me.  And, oh yeah, she liked to go running.  I had actually been praying the night before for someone to run with!  God is good.  I hadn't known Sandra for more than five minutes before we had set up a running date. 

So yesterday I got up in the dark and ran a mile or so in the semi-light to meet Sandra. I had forgotten how much I love running in the early morning... the air is cool and the day is new and people are headed off for school or work.  We met at a Mormon "church" and spent 45 minutes or an hour together.  We ran some of the time, walked some of the time, and talked all of the time.  It was great.  And we're doing it again next week.  

God is good.

 

I am not who you think I am! [thoughts on God] 08/20/2009

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Besides making a big batch of granola and four loaves of bread, I spent yesterday lost in a book that I had been told to read for months.  The truth is, I couldn't put it down.  And the truth is, now that I have read every word and finally put it down, I'm not quite sure what to say about it.  The Shack is the kind of book that takes your stereotypes, smashes them into a million pieces, and leaves you breathless.  

I'll just come right out and say it: it changed the way I view God.  Or maybe I should say it expanded my view of God.  And I'm pretty positive that was a good thing! 

All my life I have known that God is personal and God is love, but have I really believed that?  Can I really dare to believe in a God that is so intensely personal and so incredibly loving?  A God that gets so much joy from His creation?  A God that laughs?

There is something so liberating about watching your stereotypes being smashed.  It is wonderful to realize that God is not who I think He is- that He cannot fit into the box I have made for Him.  This God is way more interested in relationship than rules or (I'm gonna say it) religion.  

I'm realizing that God doesn't care if you close your eyes during the prayer... He just wants to have a conversation with you.  And another thing, I'm realizing now that deep down I have been afraid -yes, afraid- of the Holy Spirit.  He was always the radical and mysterious side of God.  The side that makes people do and believe crazy things. The side that makes me uncomfortable.  Again, I can't fit Him in my box.  But Jesus calls the Spirit "Helper", "Comforter", "Advocate", and "Intercessor" (John 14:16).  And Jesus calls Himself "Friend", "Brother", "Shepherd", etc.  And He calls God "Father" and -more intimately- "Abba".  What is so scary about all that?  I love that God and I want that relationship with Him!  And how incredible is it that He wants such a personal relationship with me?!   

Jesus says, "If you love Me, you will keep My commandments" (John 14:15).   The relationship comes first; the obedience is the natural outcome of the love.   Jesus asks me to "abide in Him" (John 15:4) and promises that through this incredible relationship my joy will be made full (John 15:11). 

So I don't know exactly what I've learned from The Shack.  I still have some questions.  I still don't like some of what William P. Young puts in his book- or some of what he leaves out, to be more specific.  But I also have a bigger picture of this incredible God, His love, and our relationship.  I'm going to search the Scriptures and find out more about Him, and I'm going to start enjoying this personal relationship on a deeper level. 

And, for the record, I am so excited!


ps. I know The Shack is a very controversial book.  I've heard people label it straight up heresy.  I've heard others make it into scripture.  I think it can be dangerous, but it has a lot of good things to say.  Have you read it?  If so, would you mind sharing some of your thoughts with me?

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