This shot has been stuck in my head for the last couple days.  It was taken by photojournalist Ben Lowy, who just got back from Afghanistan.  Here's the story in his words:

"The picture was taken in the Russian Cultural Center (in Kabul, Afghanistan), which has been completely bombed-out.  It's ground zero for opium and heroin addicts in this city.  Over two thousand of them.  On this morning, a couple hundred people were sleeping in their own filth in the basement.  It felt like you were swimming through hell.  It's the worst spot of misery and pain I've ever seen.  Hypodermic needles stuck in my shoes as I walked over to take the photo.  The light was streaming through one mortar hole.  This guy had just injected heroin.  He lifted his head into the light, at a moment of extreme ecstasy."

Make your own spiritual analogy.  Or just weep.

I made bagels the other day...

It's lots of fun working at Panera and bringing my own bagels for lunch!

A couple weeks ago I passed a homeless guy on the way to church.  To be honest, I don't remember where he was standing or even what he looked liked, but I do remember that seeing him --and passing him-- felt like a kick in the gut.  A familiar quiet Voice whispered, "If you don't help him, who will?  If you, who claim to love God and who are on your way to worship your Lord, will not love this soul, who will?"  My gut still hurts.

I remember being in a little dirty airport in Maputo, Mozambique and I remember a little boy with a torn shirt asking me for money. He was one of so many, but for some reason he stood out.  "Please friend," he said, "hungry."  Those were probably the only three words he knew in English, but they were enough to break my heart.  I didn't give him money.  I want to think that I gave him a pack of peanuts or something, but that was a while ago and most likely I'm making that up to quiet my conscience.

The fact is, the homeless guy in Knoxville and the beggar boy in Maputo were both opportunities to let Jesus love someone through me.  And the fact is, I failed them both. 

I spent this afternoon reading the book Under the Overpass, by Mike Yankoski.  That's Mike in the picture above.  Mike and his friend Sam traveled from city to city across the US-- homeless on purpose for five months.  I won't try to tell you all their stories or all the lessons that they learned, but I will tell you that the book made me think long uncomfortable thoughts about a lot of things.  Do I really believe what I say I believe?  What would my life look like if I actually lived out the words I preach so easily?  Would I still love my Lord if life suddenly got very uncomfortable?

These are good questions, but they are worthless if I don't answer them.  It was a great book and I would beg you to read it, but if I walk away from it without changing the way I live, it was a waste of my time.  I need to see people the way Jesus sees them.  I long to look through His eyes and love with His heart. 

My life is comfortable right now.  Way too comfortable.  Jesus says, "follow Me and I will make you a fisher of men."  I'm coming, Lord.  Thanks for loving the unlovely- thanks for loving me.  Please teach me to love.

Well it's about time I blogged about something other than my hair.  (Which is chopped off short now, by the way.)

The month of November was a strange one.  I was working enough hours to put me dangerously close to full time, and far too busy to notice Thanksgiving until it jumped up and surprised me one Thursday morning.  So I may not have put a whole lot of thought into the holiday, but I can honestly say that there has never been a time in my life when I have been as thankful as I am these days.  

God is, in so many ways, so incredibly good.  My cup runneth over.

I wish there was some effective way for me to communicate the gratitude that has filled up and is now spilling out of my heart.  Months ago, I had some doors slammed in my face, and accepting the fact that the Lord wanted me to stay in Knoxville this year (instead of going to Africa or Greenville) was probably the hardest things I've ever had to do.  Now, almost halfway through the school year, I wouldn't trade these days for anything.  The Lord basically told me "Elise, I want you to spend this year learning to love Me and learning to love my people."  Because, in the end, relationships -with God and with those around us- are the only things that last.  This year has been all about relationships... and it has been, without a doubt, the richest, most joy-filled and worship-saturated year of my life.

My loving Father is showering me with His blessings-- make that, drowning me in them-- and showing me that He is just that: a loving Father who gives His children good gifts.  New friends, old friends, random people, work, church, family, time, teaching, songs, conversations... the list just keeps going on.  And keeps blowing me away.

Take last weekend, for example.  God moved a mountain range to get me off of work and send me to the Farm for a couple days.  As I drove over there with Ben and Michael, He very clearly whispered these words to my heart: "Elise, I'm giving you this weekend just because I love you.  I want to show you My love.  I want to fill you with My joy."   And He sure did.  The weekend was incredible, and I came away completely overwhelmed by His goodness.  I have way too many stories to share and not enough (or any) pictures, so ask me about it sometime... :)

So I'm not sure what the next couple months will bring.  In fact, I'm pretty much completely clueless.  But I am satisfied -so, very satisfied- in my Lord and His love for me.

Well I ditched the dreads this morning, and I have to say, that makes me a bit sad. They were the source of many fascinating conversations and literally hundreds of comments. 

I do apologize for looking exceedingly grouchy in the picture above, but I was trying to decide if the resulting fro was going to become a permanent addition to my head.  In the end, I decided against it, but sure had a blast walking around like that for a few hours!

Life really is lots of fun, you know!?!

I promised some people some pictures.  

Let it be known that I absolutely love having braids- Ghana style.  It took three hours and one major headache, I'm getting quite a few strange looks and random hands touching my head, and I seem to have accquired the name "Dreads"... but this is more than worth it! 

Thanks, Victoria!  What a sister!

all my days I will sing this song of gladness
give my praise to the Fountain of delights
for in my helplessness, You heard my cry
and waves of mercy poured down on my life

beautiful Saviour, wonderful Counselor
clothed in majesty, Lord of history
You're the Way, the Truth, the Life
Star of the morning, glorious in holiness
You're the risen One, heaven's Champion
and You reign
You reign!

I will trust in the cross of my Redeemer
I will sing of the blood that never fails
of sins forgiven, of conscience cleansed
of death defeated and life without end

I long to be where the praise is never ending
yearn to dwell where the glory never fades
where countless worshipers will share one song
and cries of "worthy" will honor the Lamb

-Beautiful Saviour (Stuart Townend)

................................................................

Sang that song this morning and soaked in the lyrics.
That sunset, by the way, was hanging over our backyard!

About a month ago I was getting up around 5 AM to spend a few hours with Jesus before jumping into my day.  Now I slap my cell phone silent and fight for every extra minute of sleep.  Too often I rush through my "devotions" (a word I'm beginning to despise- ask me about it later) and read the Word like it's part of a checklist for a pharisee.  Yuck. 

But here's the neat part: even when I fail to schedule in much time for the Lord, He still makes time for me...

Example #1: After a crazy shift at work and hours of teaching ESL, I sneak into the sanctuary in at church and play the piano.  It's just me and Jesus and the piano in that huge dark room and it's incredible.  The janitors have turned out all the lights and locked all the doors (except for one that I've found!) and there isn't a soul around.  Most nights I only get five or ten minutes, but it's become such a special time with Jesus.  I'm convinced that worshiping alone in a empty dark church with a piano is one of the greatest things in life.

Example #2: Every Mon, Wed, and Fri I have a Spanish class that forces me out of the house by 7:50.  This morning I was frustrated by my lack of Jesus time and facing an absolutely jam-packed day... and guess what God did?  He cancelled my class and invited me to spend an hour with Him at Starbucks before work.  Such a good time.

He restoreth my soul!


If we are faithless, He remains faithful for He cannot deny Himself.
-2 Timothy 2:13